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How To Live Life, Apparently
A snarky guide to having a good, productive life.
As a modern human being, especially of the female persuasion, your life should be goals at all times. Your surroundings must be inspiring; humanising but not too human. Your diet should be well-balanced, though you shouldn’t put too much time into cooking or other domestic tasks — after all, if you clean your house just a little bit each day you don’t have to spend your weekends filled with housework! It’s best if you dress with a pop of colour — just a pop, not too much — and use just enough makeup to look like you’re not wearing any.
When you’re at work, your desk should be a haven. Neat, of course, and fairly minimal with just a few personal touches. One or two photos of a happy memory (your wedding perhaps, or a boozy girls night, or that inspiring vacation you took three years ago when you still fit into that stylish bikini) to keep the space feeling like “you”. A plant is an excellent addition to keep you feeling grounded and centred — green is good for the brain, apparently. A little clutter, not left to linger too long, is an acceptable alternative to regimented cleanliness. If you don’t work in an office, or from home, you are not worthy of a haven-desk and cannot decorate your work surrounding for increased productivity.